The Death Star Human Resources Department: August 11, 2023
Tacos, new Ahsoka teasers, lots of Hollywood strike talk, we go back to the Book Club, and much more
Hello there
Welcome to this week’s edition of the Death Star Human Resources Department newsletter. Hard to believe we’ve already hit our 10th one. Usually my attention span doesn’t last more than 10 minutes, let alone 10 weeks. Thanks again to everybody that has subscribed, it really does mean a lot to me that you read my ramblings every week. And as always, if you like what I’m doing please tell a friend or forward the email to them.
This week we’ve got a lot to talk about. There’s plenty to say about Ahsoka and the Hollywood strike. We read another book with the Death Star HR Book Club, and I get to talk a little bit about Knights of the Old Republic II. Let’s get to it.
But First, Tacos
Let’s start this Friday off with Taco Talk! Subscriber “Matt” sent me this picture of a taco truck in the Denver area.
It doesn’t appear Skywalker Tacos has a huge internet presence outside of their Instagram but those are some tasty looking tacos in the pics. Next time I’m in Denver, I’m going to track them down.
We’re So Close: Two New Ahsoka Trailers
By the time you read this, we will be less than two weeks away from Ahsoka’s release. The two-episode premiere hits on August 23rd. Look for a full review in the August 25th newsletter. That’s what we in the biz call a teaser.
And speakers of teasers, Disney dropped two new ones for Ahsoka last week. Unfortunately due to the timing I had to save them for this week’s email.
The first one is called “Now or Never” and it mostly just reaffirms that we’re getting the band back together. The crew of the Ghost, at least the ones we’ve seen so far, are all there gearing up for battle. The only possible new character we see is what might be the head of Jacen Syndulla riding shotgun as Hera Syndulla sends the Ghost into hyperspace.
The other thing I noticed is that Ahsoka Tano is going to fight Marrok1 at least twice. Once in what appears to be some kind of factory or shipyard, we saw this in the very first trailer for Ahsoka. And then again in a forest. I am guessing the forest fight is going to happen later in the show since we also see Sabine Wren in a lightsaber duel with Shin Hati. Possibly at the same time. At the 10 second mark, we can see Ahsoka running through the forest with someone, I can’t tell who. It could be Sabine wearing her Mandalorian helmet.
The second trailer is less focused on Ahsoka but at the same time, reveals more. Titled Masters and Apprentices, we see clips of various Jedi Masters and Padawans. Luke Skywalker and Grogu, Qui-Gon Jinn and Obi-Wan Kenobi, Darth Vader and Emperor Palpatine. You get the idea. Two things stand out. The first is the shot of Anakin followed by Ahsoka. Which normally would just be another Master and Apprentice, except it has seemingly been confirmed Hayden Christensen will appear in Ahsoka, although it’s unclear if he’ll be seen as Anakin or Vader. Maybe both. The second seems to be confirmation of what another trailer suggested, that Ahsoka had trained Sabine as a Jedi or at least in the ways of the Force2. It looks like we’re also going to get two duels between Sabine and Shin. One in the forest, the other one in which I’m guessing is Sabine’s place on Lothal. In the pic below, you can see she has long hair. It doesn’t appear she goes back to the shorter hair style from Rebels until after Ahsoka shows up.
It seems likely that early the show, Shin shows up to try to either kill Sabine or get information from her. Probably either about Ezra or Ahsoka. It also seems like we’re going to get some kind of background as to what kind training and relationship Sabine and Ahsoka had and why the kinda seemed like frenemies. It also seems likely there’s going to be the redemption arc we see so often these days, Ahsoka and Sabine put whatever past differences they had aside to work against Grand Admiral Thrawn. Only a couple weeks until we find out.
Din Grogu is Ready For His Closeup
As of the time I’m writing this, there does not seem to be an end in sight for the two Hollywood strikes. The Writers Guild of America (WGA) met with Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Produces (AMPTP), the trade group that represents the studios, on August 4th. But the two sides could not even reach an agreement on resuming contract negotiations. A news search does not show any information if the Screen Actors Guild (SAG-AFTRA) are even meeting or negotiating with the AMPTP. The longer the strikes go on, the more projects will be either cancelled or pushed back.
Right now there isn’t a whole lot known about the plot of The Mandalorian season 4. The third season ended with Mando offering his bounty hunter services to the New Republic on the down low as a way to train Grogu. It seems likely the fourth season will be a sort of back to the basics look. Each week Mando and Grogu go to a different planet to track someone bad guy down for the New Republic. I’m sure there will be a detour to Nevarro to see Greef Karga and Tatooine to see Peli Motto. No doubt Bo-Katan will do a pop-in as well. It will also let Disney use whatever material they already had for Rangers of the New Republic. Only instead of Cara Dune hunting down bad guys, it will be Mando. It also seems likely that was season 3 episode with Dr. Pershing and Ella Kane’s Coruscant adventures was probably out of Rangers.
It’s also known that there is going to be a movie directed by Dave Filoni that will basically be the capstone of the Mandoverse. The Mandalorian, The Book of Boba Fett, Ahsoka, and maybe Skeleton Crew will all get wrapped up and presumably that time period in Star Wars will be put on hold. Until Disney needs to crank up the nostalgia machine at a later date. There is some thought it could be an adaption of Heir to the Empire, but we can talk about that more in depth later.
All this to say, unless the Hollywood strikes are resolved, who knows what will actually end up happening. One result is we may get season 4 of The Mandalorian on the big screen instead of streaming. Per MakingStarWars:
Apparently, from what I am hearing, there is a fear Jon Favreau and Dave Filoni will not be able to make two seasons of Disney+ shows that are prerequisites for Dave Filoni’s Star Wars theatrical film. A question being floated is if they can take the main story of Star Wars: The Mandalorian‘s fourth season and edit those scripts into a film that will release after the Rey film. This would effectively give Filoni two theatrical Star Wars films produced by Jon Favreau. We would lose the fourth season of The Mandalorian on Disney+ for now, but we would instead experience that story as a theatrical film that would lead into Dave Filoni’s original film concept a year or so later.
The two seasons of Disney+ shows they’re referring to are season 4 of The Mandalorian and season 2 of Ahsoka. It obviously takes less time to shoot a three hour movie with one director than it does to shoot eight episodes of a TV show with anywhere from five to eight different directors. Or at least I assume it does. If the strike continues, we may end up getting Grogu on the big screen earlier than planned.
The Death Star Does Not Use Union Labor
We’re talking a lot about the Hollywood strike today. The story of Star Wars, especially the Original Trilogy, is the story of a group of people coming together to collectively achieve their goals against a larger and better funded enemy. I’m not saying the Rebel Alliance was a union shop, but I’m not saying it wasn’t either. Also it’s pretty clear in Andor that the Teamsters weren’t active on Narkina 5. The Empire wasn’t paying a fair wage there. Or any wages. The workplace conditions were deplorable, I mean an electrified floor is clearly a safety hazard.
George Lucas, from what I can tell, had mixed results when dealing with unions here on Earth, or as we unfortunately have to call it, the real world. Hey, no one is perfect. This is the guy who thought Mid-chorians were a good call.
On the positive side, per the Los Angeles Times, Lucasfilm was generally considered a good place to work and one that took care of it’s employees, noting that “[i]n 2002, the AFL-CIO honored Lucas for his commitment to his workers.”
On the other hand, there is always going to be friction between management and labor. Turning to the Dark Side, in 2005 Lucas got in a battle with the International Alliance of Theatrical Stage Employees Local 16, a union that represented workers at Skywalker Sound. Even filing a claim with the National Labor Relations Board that Local 16 was refusing to negotiate in good faith.
Lucas famously fought with the Directors Guild of America (DGA) when making the Original Trilogy. At the time, DGA rules required the credits to go at the start of the movie. Star Wars of course has its famous opening crawl. Lucas got away with it for A New Hope since no one thought it would a hit. For Empire Strikes Back, Lucas again fought with the DGA about the opening crawl. This time the DGA wasn’t going to let things slide. Lucas paid a fine and quit the DGA. Then when Return of the Jedi came around, Lucas had to find a director who wasn’t part of the DGA. Enter Richard Marquand, who was not part of the DGA since he was based across the pond.
Lucas also fought with the union during the filming of the first Star Wars. The shoot took place in England where the Union had apparently negotiated not one, but two tea breaks during the day. When it was tea time, work stopped. Didn’t matter what they were doing. I’m saying this as an American, but a union mandated tea break almost sounds like the joke from The Simpsons classic episode “Last Exit To Springfield” where Mr. Burns tries to get the workers at the power plant to give up their dental plan in exchange for a keg of beer. Because in the end, all things come back to The Simpsons in my world.
Death Star Human Resources Department Book Club
Two book club posts in a row. I’m actually not trying to make this a weekly thing, partly to keep things mixed up and partly just because while there are a ton of Star Wars books on my shelf, I try to read a lot of different types of books. But I wanted to A) get this book done before I forget the details of what I read and B) it’s the last book in the unofficial trilogy that was started with the last book we looked at, Labyrinth of Evil.
Title: Dark Lord: The Rise of Darth Vader
Author: James Luceno
Date published: November 22, 2005
Pages: 338
Status: Legends
Summary in less than 20 words: The definitive book about a young Darth Vader which actually features a lot less Vader than you’d think.
Darth Vader is of course one of the most iconic characters in cinema history. But there’s one thing that has never been explained in any of his movie appearances. Namely, and most importantly, how does Darth Vader go to the bathroom? If you’ve ever wonder how Darth Vader poops, this is the book for you.
The book opens at the end of the Clone Wars with Jedi Masters Roan Shryne, Bol Chatak and Padawan Olee Starstone on a mission to the planet Murkhana with a bunch of Clone Troopers. Order 66 goes live. Some of the Clone Troopers are ready to blaster our three Jedi into space dust, some other Clone Troopers aren’t too sure about the order so they let the Jedi go, but warn them it’s a head start, not a free pass. Of course since these are some C-List Jedi made up for the book, they manage to get themselves recaptured.
Meanwhile Anakin Skywalker is still getting used to being Darth Vader. It turns out being The Chosen One isn’t all it cracked up to be. Maybe having your former best friend and father/mentor figure seize the high ground, chop off your legs with his laser sword, and leave you to roast to death in the lava isn’t such a great thing after all. The suit is sweaty, you can’t see anything, robot legs are clunky, and how exactly are you supposed to pee in this thing? Maybe Dark Helmet had it right.
Ol’ Palpatine knows that Vader is really being Nu-Metal Teen-Angst Anakin. He also knows that the Sith Apprentice is always a threat to the Sith Master. So it’s in Palpatine’s best interest to give Vader something to do. What better way to district his brooding apprentice than by sending him to deal with some Jedi that survived Order 66 and some Clone Troopers that somehow managed to think for themselves. On Murkhana, Vader duels and kills Bol Chatak but the other two Jedi manage to escape. Roan thinks the Jedi just need to make themselves scarce and hooks up with a smuggling crew run by…his mom? Olee on the other hand wants to assemble all the remaining Jedi they can find.
Meanwhile over on Alderaan, Bail Organa struggles with protecting baby Leia and trying to protect the galaxy from Emperor Palpatine’s ever expanding iron grip. It’s so hard for a modern working dad to have it all. The little detour to Alderaan when Olee and her new found Jedi crew show up to attempt to rescue Senator Fang Zar, a Palpatine opponent. Vader shows up as well with instructions to capture Zar. A battle ensues, Vader kills Zar and wounds one of the other disposable Jedi.
Olee decides to bring her crew to Kashyyyk, knowing that Yoda had traveled there and hoping it would be a safe place to hang out. The Empire heads to Kashyyyk as well. Vader to track down the Jedi. The rest of the Empire to obtain the Wookiees as slave labor to build a SUPER SECRET PROJECT WHAT COULD IT BE??? After a battle that goes on probably longer than it needs to, Vader is going to finish what Order 66 started, when all of a sudden Roan comes back to try to save the day. And while Roan is a decent Jedi, he’s not match for the Chosen One. Vader kills Roan and the Empire takes over Kashyyk, but Chewbacca, Olee, and the remaining Jedi are able to escape.
The book ends with “Ben” Kenobi and his really weak disguise on Tatooine, watching over baby Luke. There he learns that his old BFF Anakin is still alive and is Darth Vader. Thankfully the ghost of Qui-Gon visits him to let him know to just chill out, Luke will save the day eventually.
What works:
Vader’s struggle to adjust to the Vader suit was really well done. Luceno got the idea after talking with someone who had to wear a Vader suit for LucasArts video games and what it was like.
Palpatine’s never-ending Svengali role with Anakin/Vader is always fun. He needs to get Vader out of his funk. Otherwise he’ll just be moping around his room, listening to whatever the Star Wars equivalent of Linkin Park is, telling Palpatine how much he sucks and that Palpatine isn’t his real dad3. But Palpatine knows if he makes Vader too strong, eventually Vader will do the Sith thing and try to kill Palaptine.
What doesn’t work:
The book, especially the first half or so really focuses more on Roan, Olee, and company rather than Vader. You’ve got the Dark Lord of the Sith on the cover. He should be at least 3/4th of the book.
The detour to Alderaan and the end with Obi-Wan on Tatooine felt a little forced, like the editors got a note from Lucas to add more legacy characters.
The big battle on Kashyyyk could use to be cut down. It just felt like it wasn’t going to end.
Wild card:
Vader’s suit has a system of “catheters, collection pouches, and recyclers to deal with liquid and solid waste.” I told you we deal with how Vader poops.
From the Depths of Wookieepedia
We’ve got a good one today, B-4D4-GE3. We meet B-4D4 in Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II: The Sith Lords. Yet another Star Wars video game with two colons in the title. KOTOR II is a fantastic game that got done dirty by Lucas Arts, who insisted the game be out for the holiday season. It put a ton of pressure on Obsidian Entertainment, the developer and as such, an incomplete game was rushed to market. Even with the rush, KOTOR II is a masterpiece in both story and gameplay, but it could have been better. Don’t worry, we’ll talk about the KOTOR games eventually. Today we’re just talking about a specific protocol droid.
B-4D4 was a protocol droid employed by Czerka Corporation. Czerka was created for the old Star Wars pencil and paper RPG but most Star Wars fans probably know it from the KOTOR games. Czerka is basically what happens if Wal-Mart and Amazon had a baby and they put Elon Musk in charge. Just pure corporate evil and chaos. In this KOTOR II mission, if you’re playing the Light Side, which is the canonical version, your character is helping the Ithorians with something that doesn’t really matter but needs to be done because it’s an RPG. And what’s an RPG without pointless side quests?
Basically, your character, The Exile, is able to reprogram the droid to give it the ability to lie. Not common in droids. You then send the droid back to the Czerka office, cause a distraction by having another droid, T1-N1, go wild and attack the employees while B-4D4 steals the information it needs from the Czerka mainframe, erases any information regarding itself, and then take T1-N1 and catch the first shuttle to Nar Shaddaa. Not bad for a protocol droid.
News From the HoloNet
Padme Amidala divorce rumors are swirling
Natalie, if you’ve decided your type is no longer “French dancer” but instead “hipster cat dad”, my DMs are open.
It’s too late for a Lando TV show
Counterpoint: the Lando show should have already happened.
"Hollywood Should Actually Cast Matt Berry in a Star Wars Project"
Second counterpoint: Berry was already 8D8 in Book of Boba Fett. Furthermore, he should also be in all Star Wars productions.
We’re going to have to talk about Life Day
New documentary out about the Star Wars Holiday Special. George Lucas is angry.
That’s it for this week. If you like what I’m doing, please subscribe. I’ll catch you next week, and may the Force be with you.
For more information on Marrok, please refer to last week’s issue of Death Star HR
One can be trained in the ways of the Force without being a Jedi.