The Death Star Human Resources Department Newsletter: July 19, 2024
Hello there
Good morning, or afternoon, or whenever you get around to reading this and welcome to this week’s edition of the Death Star Human Resources Department Newsletter. The Acolyte wrapped up this week and a much anticipated character from Legends made an appearance. More below, I won’t spoil it here. I’ll just say it gave me a good excuse to post a bunch of Star Wars memes. Plus we’ve got some new and tasty Star Wars merchandising along with all the usual fun.
As always, I appreciate you reading and/or subscribing. Now, let’s get to it.
This Is Where The Fun Begins
Auto-correct is funny.
Possibly a parody account, who can say. The internet these days is peak Poe’s Law.
The Acolyte: All Roads Lead To Brendok
Well…we made it folks. Confession time. I am always a little relieved when a TV show wraps up. As you have probably figured out if you’re a regular reader of Death Star HR, there’s very little structure to this newsletter. I mostly just write about anything within the Star Wars galaxy that captures my attention. Sometimes it’s current, sometimes it’s not. But when there’s a new TV show, I have to write about it. I guess I don’t have to. But I think most people would find it a little weird if they were subscribing to a Star Wars newsletter and the author isn’t talking about the current Star Wars show. And with Disney’s releasing the episodes weekly like a network TV show instead of dropping them all as a Netflix style binge, it means every week I need to come up with something to say about the episode.
Anyway…after eight episodes and countless articles speculating who might or might not show up, we finally got something that resembled a conclusion for The Acolyte.
Just a warning. The Witches’ fortress on Brendok contains spoilers
We started the show with the four Jedi. We ended the show with none of them. That’s a bold choice that you really don’t see much in TV. Maybe other than Game of Thrones. I think this weekend I am going to binge the whole series and I’ll have my thoughts on The Acolyte as a whole next week. But for now, we’re going to talk about Episode 8.
Like all the Star Wars shows, it’s almost impossible to stick the landing and please everyone. Especially when there is a vocal section of your “fan”base that will hate it no matter what. After watching it twice, the season (maybe the series) ended about as well as it could have. Twists, turns, fights, and a couple of surprise cameos.
I’ve enjoyed how the show skips around the timeline, but it does make it a little jarring when episode 8 kicks off right where episode 6 left off. I even told myself that I was positive the episode would start with Osha wearing The Strangers cortosis helmet. After a little bit of Witchery, they’re off to Brendok. Same with Sol and Mae. This was the only way this could really end. I’m going to rewatch the whole series so I can fully collect my thoughts.
The biggest surprise for me was Sol dying at the hand (literally) of Osha. Although in retrospect everything with Mae and Osha was telegraphed. Osha went from wearing white to black. Mae went from black to white. A bit on the nose and I should have picked up on it after episode 6. Star Wars isn’t always subtle.
The Good:
Lightsaber duels and Force Fu. This applies to The Acolyte as a whole, but Sol dueling with The Stranger was a lot of fun. Same with Osha and Mae’s duel where they, naturally, mimicked the other one’s moves.
The cameos. Both Yoda and Darth Plagueis were fun and made sense for the story. They didn’t feel like cheap fan service.
Senator Rayencourt calls the Jedi for what they are. Sure, the Jedi are generally a force for good. Or at least whatever they and the Senate/Republic deem to be good. One could certainly argue they are tools for the Republic to keep Order. But there are plenty of examples of just one person actually feeling with Force powers who can wreck havoc in the galaxy. Maybe some external oversight isn’t the worst idea.
This was the first episode I was actually interested in Osha and Mae. I don’t know what is was, I just didn’t find their characters especially compelling. This week’s finally mixed things up a bit and made them more interesting.
The Bad:
I’m not saying the appearance of Darth Plagueis was bad, per se. I just thought that Mother Koril made much more sense to be Qimir’s master
Again, it isn’t inherently bad, but it was clearly written with season 2 in mind. One thing that makes the first two seasons of The Mandalorian along the best Disney has done is both seasons are self-contained. Dance as if no one is watching. Write as if you won’t get a second season.
Wildcard:
Lightsaber bleeding!
Blue to red - a Sith wants you dead. Red to blue - light side are you. Source.
Darth Plagueis: A Smart Guy
So in the first third of Episode 8 of The Acolyte, there was a moment when millions of old school Star Wars Legends fans (it’s still the Expanded Universe to us) sudden gasped. Was The Stranger’s master finally revealed? And was that…Darth Plagueis???
The Legend of Darth Plagueis was introduced in Revenge of the Sith, when rather than pay attention to the Space Opera, Chancellor Palpatine rudely ignores the show to tell Anakin the story of Darth Plagueis.
That’s all we knew at the time about Darth Plagueis, but neither Lucas nor Palpatine are known for their subtlety, so at that point we all knew that Palpatine was Plagueis’ apprentice and he killed Plagueis. Also, the scene spawned 1,000 memes as the army of Prequel Kids meme’d the Prequels back into respectability.
The definitive story about Plagueis is the 2012 novel Darth Plagueis by regular Star Wars author James Luceno. The idea for a Darth Plagueis book goes back to probably shortly after of Revenge of the Sith. Luceno stated in an interview he wanted to do a story about Qui-Gon Jinn and Darth Plagueis each looking for immortality in their own way. Due to concerns about the Star Wars timeline and things of that nature, the novel didn’t come out until 2012. The book was published just before George sold his empire to Disney. Disney didn’t actually take the books out of canon for another year and a half or so after purchase.
In the book, which while is Legends nothing has been contradicted as far as I know, Plagueis is a Muun, a species first seen in Attack of the Clones. Plagueis was an apprentice to Darth Tenebrous but in true Sith style, he whacked his master1. On Bal'demnic. An Outer Rim planet with cliffs, islands, and oceans along with deposits of cortosis. Sounds familiar? Plagueis was obsessed with immortality and thought he could achieve it through science. He studied bio-engineering, conducting experiments on various beings and eventually figured out how to manipulate mid-chorians to either create life or using the power to keep people from dying.
Of course, Plagueis has the misfortune to meet a young Sheev2 Palpatine learns all he can from Plagueis and then kills him, Rule of Two style. This of course happens much later down the road in the timeline than The Acolyte. It’s one of the better Star Wars Legends novels out there. In that it gives a good story of a new character, fills out the back story for an established character, and generally just keeps you interested. Too many of the Star Wars books are just “A Jedi you know explores a threat on a new planet. They save the day but the bigger threat remains.” Might actually be worth re-reading Darth Plagueis if I can ever find the time.
OK, one more.
Fear Leads to Anger, Anger Leads to Clicks
I suppose I can’t complain when last week I post about how Star Wars is inherently political and anti-fascist and post a meme about Project 2025. But the cultural wars are exhausting and I’m always annoyed when I write about them.
I never said I was consistent. Much like Ki-Adi-Mundi’s birthday.
Last week I was on YouTube looking to see if there were any video clips that I could screen grab the Kelnacca/Sol/Torbin duel. Instead, as I search for The Acolyte Episode 7, here’s what I got3.
I will be honest, I did not watch any of those videos. Those channels not getting my click won’t make any difference but I’d like to at least not have the YouTube algorithm thinking I want more like that.
Look, I’m not saying Star Wars is above criticism, far from it. I’m also not saying The Acolyte is perfect. I thought it was good. I’m going to binge it and see if watching it in one sitting changes my thoughts. But with every new Star Wars movie or TV series, I WANT it to be good. I don’t want to have to go all Comic Book Guy and just make Death Star HR me saying “worst episode ever.” That’s not fun. I don’t wish that. I want every new Star Wars TV show or movie to just melt my face with awesomeness. Nothing like setting realistic expectations.
Here’s the thing. If you want to make money on YouTube, you need clicks. If you want to get clicks you need to go to the extremes. Nothing on YouTube is just fine. It’s either the best thing ever or the worst thing ever. There’s no in between. Out of the four videos in my screenshot, I don’t know if the creators actually hate The Acolyte or they know that the never-satisfied maw of the content creation monster needs to be filled.
You should be cynical of anyone trying to peddle outrage, whether or not the outraged person is sincere doesn’t matter. Because it doesn’t matter what they actually believe as long as you the viewer will react to it.
If I uploaded a video that said “The Acolyte is pretty good but I wish these things were a little different” it probably wouldn’t get much traction. If I uploaded a video that was titled “KATHLEEN KENNEDY AND THE WOKEALYTE CAUSED MY WIFE TO LEAVE ME FOR A COVEN OF LESBIAN WITCHES” with a thumbnail of me doing YouTube Face, I probably could have gone viral. And that’s always the end goal.
Great Moments in Star Wars Merchandising
I like to think of myself as sort of above the fray. I, as sole proprietor of Death Star HR, look down upon the Star Wars world with discernment and cool detachment. I’m not one who goes nuts over any trinket that Disney slaps a Star Wars logo on.
Also, I bought Oreos, something I buy like every 5 years, because I wanted Dark Side cookies.
It’s kind of a cool idea. The Dark Side cookies have red creme and the bad characters on them. You can see above there’s a Jabba the Hutt and a Scout Trooper. The Light Side ones have blue creme and your Lukes and Leias and whatnot. You don’t know what you’re getting until you open the package. Considering I live with Emperor Palpatine’s #1 Fan, it seems like it was our destiny to get the Dark Side cookies.
One fun fact. The artwork was designed by Greg Hidelbrandt, who along with his brother, Tom, did the poster for the original Star Wars release in Great Britain.
It’s known as the “Style B” poster, based on the very famous “Style A” poster which you all know. The Style A poster was the cover for the 2021 Japanese Record Store Day A New Hope soundtrack that I wrote about back on April 19th. I’m glad the Style B poster kept the vibe of turning Mark Hamil into Arnold Schwarzenegger.
This Day in Star Wars History
A few births worth noting and a rebirth on July 19 in the Star Wars universe.
Mark Capri was born in 1951. He’s in Empire Strikes Back as the Imperial officer who tells Captain Needa that Lord Vader is demanding an update. The character’s name is M’Kae. Just one name, like Prince.
Voice actress Tudi Roche was born in 1955. She voiced Mika Grey in two episodes of Resistance. She’s also from San Angelo, Texas. Which is the county seat of Tom Green County. And if you’re a Gen X’er with a warped sense of humor like me, your mind immediately went to comedian Tom Green.
Another voice actress, Courtenay Taylor, was born in 1969. As I’ll take any excuse to talk about KOTOR, she provided the voice of Juhani.
One more Resistance voice actress from Texas. Cherami Leigh was born in 1988 in Dallas. She voiced Mia Gabon, a New Republic Defense Force pilot. Also a fun fact about Dallas. Besides being the home to the Death Star HR HQ, nobody actually knows who or what the city is named for.
In 2018, the trailer for the 7th and finale season from The Clone Wars was released. It might be time to revisit the series, it’s been a while.
From the Depths of Wookieepedia
I also skipped this one. But in my never-ending quest to find the most mundane and trivial Wookieepedia entry, I might just have a winner. And that winner is Thedyklae.
A Thedyklae was a type of herd creature from an unspecified planet.
That’s it. That’s the entire entry. Some kind of Space Cow on a planet we don’t know of gets an entry. Kinda feel like if a thedyklae gets a Wookieepedia entry, then Death Star HR should have one.
News From the HoloNet
The Stranger in THE ACOLYTE Could Be the Link Between the Sith and Knights of Ren
The Stranger and Kylo both have some emo vibes.
The Acolyte’s first season made Star Wars’ dark past feel like a bright future
I liked a lot of the ideas from The Acolyte. Let’s hope it continues.
‘The Acolyte’ Season 2? The Good News And Bad News
Hard to see, the future is.
The Acolyte‘s Fascinating Parallels Between Jedi Recruitment and Colonialism
Remember what I said about Star Wars being inherently political…
That’s it for this week. If you like what I’m doing, please subscribe. I’ll catch you next week, and may the Force be with you.
Is there really any difference between the Sith and the mob?
Never liked Palpy’s first name. Feel like one of those things George came up with in 30 seconds like Darth Icky.
As I went back to YouTube so I could take a screenshot for this week’s newsletter, the algorithm fed me a video of GWAR covering/rewriting the I’m Just Ken song. So the internet still can be good.
As usual, great stuff. Thanks for summarizing the Darth Plagueis book! I haven’t read it!
#thewokewarsturnedmysithdogtrans
Elwood kept asking for Star Wars Oreos for a week and a half and was disappointed no matter which side we got. Eventually he revealed it was because he wanted ones with the green lightsabers.
Shades of my youth where I got upset every time she brought the wrong movie back from the video store because I thought the Ewoks were called Goonies. (Disclaimer: I wanted Caravan of Courage, not ROTJ)