The Death Star Human Resources Department: December 15, 2023
Talking tattoos, Mando news, you gotta have a plan, and spinning vinyl.
Hello there
Welcome to this week’s edition of the Death Star Human Resources Department Newsletter. I really thought this was going to be a short one. But as always, I get on a topic and just keep typing. This week we’ve got a quick bit of Mando news, Reylo spills the beans on the Sequel Trilogy’s lack of vision, and what was going to be a Great Moments on Star Wars Merchandising bit leads me on a journey and makes me question what I know about Return of the Jedi.
As always, if you like what I’m doing please subscribe. And if you’ve already subscribed, well, that’s really all I ask from you. Now, let’s get to it.
This Is Where The Fun Begins
It would not surprise me if there was a subreddit dedicated to just Anakin/Younglings memes.
If I was going to get a Star Wars tattoo, what should I get? Maybe Darth Taco from the August 25th Death Star HR.
Din Grogu Will Be Back on TV
No time for a big write up as I’m seeing this Thursday night, but it looks like season 4 of The Mandalorian will be a streaming series and not a movie. The Bespin Bulletin has the scoop:
According to at least two sources, The Mandalorian season four is gearing up to start filming sometime in February. It could be very late January, but February seems more realistic from what I’ve been hearing for a number of weeks. I don’t know how long filming is set to last on the fourth season, but if it follows the production of The Mandalorian season three, it’ll likely film for six months, meaning it would wrap by August. I’ve been hearing the February start for a number of weeks and though things could well easily change, as of the time of writing, I’m hearing a February start.
He goes on to say the target release date will be sometime in 2025. Which should give us Andor and Mando in the same year. That’s not bad. Also, Dave Filoni. Plenty of time for you to get me in the writers room. My DMs are open.
Kylo Ren Says the Quiet Part Loud
I am not here to relitigate the Sequel Trilogy. Enough ink and pixels have been spilled on this topic and we’re at the point where all sides are dug in and nobody is going to change each the hearts and minds of the other side. We shouldn’t fight anyway. We should be a big Star Wars family. Sure, we can have our disagreements, but no real fights. If we’re going to have beef, let’s beef with the Dune people or the Battlestar Galactica fans. They’re the real nerds here, right?
The biggest issue with the Sequel Trilogy is not one particular movie, or director, or character. I’m not even saying it’s all bad. There are good movies, good characters, and good moments in the Sequel Trilogy. Even the one particular movie I often am less than enthusiastic about has some cool parts.
No, the biggest issue is that Disney did not learn from Emperor Palpatine. And that is you will pay the price for your lack of vision.
Look, say what you will about the Prequels. There is a clear and coherent story through the three movies. It is the downfall of the Jedi and the Republic and the rise of Darth Vader and the Empire. George had a vision and told the story that he wanted to tell. And you can see how the story goes together across the movies. Were adjustments made based on fan reaction? I’m certain of it. There’s a lot less Jar Jar in Episode II and III, that’s for sure.
Adam Driver was recently on The Rich Eisen Show1 and said:
"Where Vader starts the most confident, the most committed to the dark side, and by the last movie he's the most vulnerable and weak. And he wanted to start it the opposite, where this character was the most confused and vulnerable, and by the end of the three movies, would be most committed to the dark side. So I tried to keep that arc in mind, regardless if that wound up not being the journey anyway, because it changed, obviously."
Ok, things change. That happens.
"With Rian [Johnson, director], he took it into a different direction," Driver revealed. "But [it] still tracked with the character. Then the last one, it changed into being about them, and the dyad, and things like that. And evolving into Ben Solo, that was never part of it. He was Ben Solo from the beginning, but it was never a version where we actually see Ben Solo when I first signed up for it."
This isn’t exactly new, although it may be the first time Driver has ever commented on it. A few years ago, Daisy Ridley talked about the her character went from Rey to Rey Kenobi to Rey the Trash Person to Rey Palpatine and finally to Rey Skywalker.
“No. At the beginning there was toying with like an Obi-Wan connection,” Ridley said when asked if she had known Rey’s origins were in the Palpatine family. “There were like different versions, and then it really went to that she was no one. Then it came to Episode IX and J.J. pitched me the film and was like, ‘Oh yeah, Palpatine’s grandaughter.” I was like, ‘Awesome!’ Then two weeks later he was like, ‘Oh, we’re not sure.’ So it kept changing. Even as we were filming I wasn’t sure what the answer was going to be.”
From the way Ridley tells it, the decision to make Rey a Palpatine wasn’t finalized until the middle of filming “The Rise of Skywalker.” “The Last Jedi” writer-director Rian Johnson earned backlash from fans for making Rey’s parents nobodies after “The Force Awakens” implied her parents could be important to the “Star Wars” mythology. Turning Rey into a Palpatine was viewed by many as J.J. Abrams retconning Johnson’s controversial decision, which Ridley’s answer here seems to validate.
For the record, I would have been fine with Rey Kenobi. Really, if I were to pick a member of the Jedi Council to have a kid, Obi-Wan would be the top of the list. Satine Kryze was certainly into Obi-Wan. In the Kenobi book I reviewed way back in the July 7th Death Star HR, Annie the nice widow who runs the general store clearly wants a piece of “Ben.” And who can forgot Asajj Ventress? You can cut the tension between her and Obi-Wan with a lightsaber.
Anyway, back to my original point. A company that’s worth hundreds of billions of dollars is set to launch movies for a property that’s beloved by generations all across the world, and it seems their attitude is “we’ll just make it up as we go along.” That is…well…it’s something.
Becoming Special Edition Pilled
This was going to be a Great Moments in Star Wars Merchandising but it sent me down a bigger rabbit hole.
Recently a friend introduced me to the site/app Whatnot. It’s basically Twitch meets eBay. The elevator pitch is livestream auctions.There’s Star Wars items, mostly either LEGOs or trading cards. Plus all sorts of other stuff. Baseball cards, Funkos, electronics, etc.. Unlike eBay auctions which last a week, Whatnot auctions can be as quickly as 5 or 10 seconds.
Now, I have a decent collection of vinyl, but I don’t really consider myself a record collector. I’m not looking for ultra-rare 1st pressings or obscure copies of the Star Wars soundtrack performed by the Kazakhstan National Symphony on a picture disc of Han shooting first. Wait, actually I want that last one more than anything. I buy records to open and listen to. But when I saw this one, I couldn’t refuse.
It’s a Japanese Return of the Jedi soundtrack. The piece of paper on the side is called an Obi Strip. A quick Google search did not indicate if the Obi Strip has anything to do with Obi-Wan Kenobi, but Lucas was a big fan of Japanese director Akira Kurosawa, so who can say.
I gave it a spin today as I was working, it sounded great. But the thing that struck me the most was “Lapti Nek”,2 the original song that the Max Rebo Band played at Jabba’s Palace. I knew, of course, that the Special Editions changed “Lapti Nek”to “Jedi Rocks” and added a bunch of new CGI characters for the band along with giving Sy Snootles (called “Snooty” in the liner notes) an upgrade from a puppet to a CGI character.
My loyal readers, I am almost ashamed to admit this, but I had completely forgotten what “Lapti Nek” sounded like. It was almost like hearing the song again for the first time. It sounded vaguely familiar but that’s about it. Weirdly, after I flipped to Side B and spun “Yub Nub” it came back at once. Probably because “Yub Nub” is an absolute banger and never should have been removed from the soundtrack.
Which then got me thinking, when is the last time I saw the Original Trilogy in its original, non-Special Edition, format? I honestly cannot say. The Special Editions hit the theaters in 1997. I purchased, and still have, the Special Editions on VHS. Then two years later The Phantom Menace came out and a year after that, DVD’s became a thing. The non-Special Editions were lost to time and changing media formats. It’s entirely possible that I haven’t see A New Hope where Han drops Greedo in roughly 25 years. I’ve just accepted the Special Editions because Lucas and Disney and VHS players going away have forced my hand.
That sent me down a rabbit hole of feeling old. There are likely at least one, maybe two generations of Star Wars fans who have only ever known the Special Editions. Sure, they’ve heard bitter Gen X’ers talk about Han shooting first or “not my A New Hope” but they don’t actually know what I’m…I mean…the bitter Gen X’ers are talking about. We’re not that far removed from a generation of fans having no clue what “Yub Nub” is. They’ll think it’s something us old people made up.
The last time I was visiting Mom Mothma and Darth Dad, I liberated the 1995 Original Trilogy on VHS. Lucas called these the “final video release” or something like that. Which in retrospect was kind of a threat. Doing a little research on it, each tape started with a little piece of Lucas doing an interview with Leonard Maltin, I have a vague recollection of watching that segment once then fast forwarding through it every other time. These are sitting on a shelf a few feet away from me. I owned a VCR far longer than most normal people, and got rid of it years ago. Checking eBay, VCRs are surprisingly expensive:
The sweet goodness of the unaltered3 Original Trilogy sits just a few feet away and right now I have no way to watch them. Guess I’ll just have to listen to “Lapti Nek” again.
From the Depths of Wookieepedia
In the spirit of the approaching holidays, this week we’ve got the Lady of Pain.
The Lady of Pain was a Rattataki crime lord who lived during The Old Republic. Her big thing was hosting gladiator fights. Just thing the to talk about while passing the turkey.
It’s pretty clear the designers for The Old Republic MMO figured since the voice actress for Asajj Ventress was going to voice The Lady of Pain, they might as well just make the two characters look the same. I never actually played The Old Republic MMO, pretty sure I discussed MMO’s recently and that when they were in their heyday, I just didn’t have the time. And for this one, I’ve never gotten over Knights of the Old Republic III getting cancelled for The Old Republic MMO.
News From the HoloNet
Natasha Liu Bordizzo and Ivanna Sakhno discuss becoming friends
Can you add me to the group text? I’ve got some Ahsoka questions.
Hayden Christensen Eager to Return to Franchise
Natalie Portman Is 'Open' To A Star Wars Return - There's Just One Problem
If Palpatine can return for Episode IX, we can bring back Padre
That’s it for this week. If you like what I’m doing, please subscribe. I’ll catch you next week, and may the Force be with you.
Seems a little weird as I’m pretty sure Eisen is a NFL guy
Lapti Nek translates to “fancy man” in Huttese. Of Jabba would think of himself as fancy, but now I like to think of Jabba wearing a top hat and monocle like the Monopoly Man.
The 1995 release is far closer to the original theater releases than the Special Editions, but really Lucas had been making small changes almost since the movies came out.