The Death Star Human Resources Department: October 20, 2023
A week of odds and ends. What's coming on TV to rot our brains, and some new shoes. It's a weird one.
Hello there
Good morning and welcome to the 20th issue of the Death Star Human Resources Department Newsletter. Once again, thanks to everyone who’s stuck with me on this wild ride. I often say this but I truly do appreciate every single person, or alien, or droid, who reads this. Also, this is going to be a shorter than normal newsletter. By the time this hits your inbox, I will have been out of town for a week and everything was written ahead of time. So if there’s some breaking news that you were expecting to see discussed, it will have to wait until next week.
As always, if you like what I’m doing here at Death Star HR, please smash that subscribe button and tell a friend. There’s no marketing budget here. I don’t really do social media. Word of mouth and bothering people until they sign up is all that we’re doing. Now, let’s get to it.
This Is Where The Fun Begins
It’s Ahsoka, but in the style of The A-Team…
I actually laughed out loud when they introduced Huyang…
Feeding the Never-ending Content Machine
It’s been 11 years since Disney purchased Lucasfilm. In that time we’ve had five movies in a span of five years. A pace that was previously unheard of. Both the OT and the Prequels were three movies in 6 years, with a 16 year break between ROTJ and TPM. It’s not enough. We’ve had seven seasons of live-action TV. Along with numerous cartoons, aimed at both older and younger fans. In short, if you want to watch something in the galaxy far far away, it’s available to you on demand.
I don’t want to say that’s made us fans entitled…maybe accustomed would be the better word, to always having new content. Besides, even in years between movies it wasn’t like there was a lack of Star Wars stuff for us to indulge in. You had books, videogames, toys, comics, etc.. There’s a whole section of Death Star HR dedicated the awesome, fun, and weird things that Lucasfilm and Disney have slapped the Star Wars brand on. But now that the Mouse is in charge, we are getting pretty used to new live-action Star Wars content on the regular. Now that Ahsoka is over, let’s take a look at what’s coming up in the world of Disney+ streaming.
2023
Skeleton Crew
Release date is supposed to be late 2023 but considering we’re in the last part of October and we don’t have a release date, early 2024 might be more likely.
There still hasn’t been a lot of info released. It will be 8 episodes and stars Jude Law. The show has been described as an 80’s kids adventure like E.T. or The Goonies. It takes place in the Mandoverse so I expect we’ll get some cameos.
Jaleel White, best known as Steve Urkel, is apparently playing a pirate.
2024
The Acolyte
No release date yet. It is supposed to be sometime in 2024. All release dates are going to be less concrete due to the writers and actors strike.
The Acolyte takes place roughly 100 years before The Phantom Menace. I believe this is still in the High Republic era but I’m not positive. As much as I want to get into the High Republic stuff I haven’t had the chance yet. It’s supposed to be less blasters and laser swords and more political intrigue, a set up of how the Republic got to the point a Sith Lord could infiltrate and overthrow it.
There’s going to be a Wookiee Jedi. He or she is already my new favorite character.
Andor: Season 2
Current release date is August 2024. But again, things can change. Production paused over the summer due to the strikes.
The series is supposed to cover 5 years, right up to the events of Rogue One. I’m assuming we’ll get to see how Cassian and K-2SO became BFF. And more of our star-crossed lovers, Syril Karn and fascist Barbie Dedra Meero.
Will Andor’s search for his sister become a plot point? Or was it just an excuse to kick off the events of season 1 so the Imperials would show up on Ferrix?
The Bad Batch: Season 3
Again, there’s no confirmed release date. It’s unknown whether the strikes affected the show. In June, Michelle Ang, who voices Omega, posted a photo on her Instragram that would seem to indicate the voice work had wrapped.
It’s also been confirmed this is the final season.
The official trailer hasn’t been made public but there is a leaked trailer from Star Wars Celebration that’s made it’s way to YouTube.
Lots of questions to be answered. Will Omega get rescued? Probably. Will Crosshair stop being a jerk? Probably not. Is Tech actually dead? Hmmm…I’m going to say no but it would be better if he was.
Confirmed - No date
Lando
No official title yet. At this point all that’s known is it’s gone from a TV show to a movie, Donald Glover will reprise his role as Lando, and Stephen Glover, his brother is the writer.
The Mandalorian: season 4
No date yet. This was mentioned in another Death Star HR newsletter a while back, there was some reporting that Disney considers Mando season 4 and Ahsoka season 2 as the pre-requisites for Dave Filoni’s Mando-verse movie. It’s possible season 4 will be turned into a movie to move the process along.
In February of this year, Jon Favreau confirmed he had already written season 4, but a lot can change.
Ahsoka: season 2
I don’t believe there is an official Disney announcement, other than the cliffhanger at the end of season 1.
But come on, it’s obviously happening.
Except the return of the Mortis Gods.
Your Guess is as Good as Mine
Taika Waititi’s Movie
It hasn’t been cancelled by Disney, but they don’t seem to be in a hurry to make it happen.
In the very first Death Star HR newsletter, I suggested a Star Wars/What We Do In The Shadows crossover and I’m standing by it.
I know I said I was just doing TV shows, but I love Taika Waititi and really hope this gets made.
A Droid Story
An animated show that is supposed to feature R2-D2, C-3PO, and a new droid. Again, it hasn’t been cancelled but there’s no new info.
Book of Boba Fett: Season 2
Even if Book of Boba Fett was the weakest of the live-action shows, it seems pretty unlikely that Disney won’t crank up the money making machine and give Boba Fett another try.
Knights of the Old Republic
My white whale, right here. A KOTOR movie.
It was announced way back in 2019, although there was never an official announcement. I’m not going to hold my breath.
Leave the Dogfights to the Droids
Something that always struck me about the Star Wars universe, you have droids that can to most things a human can, but the humans, or aliens just kept doing the tasks themselves. In some ways, that might be admirable. Wall-E was a terrifying vision of what happens when we just let the machines do everything for us. Wall-E also starred Ben Burtt, who, as the person who invented the lightsaber sound, should be given the Noble Prize for Noises.
Droids do a little bit of everything in the galaxy far far away. The can translate languages, fix moisture vaporators, calculate hyperspace routes, work as bounty hunters, or just walk around saying “gonk.”
When Luke, Leia, Han, and Chewie escape the from the Death Star in the Millennium Falcon and the Empire sends a pitful four TIE Fighters to try to stop them, Luke and Han each strap in to one of the Falcon’s quad cannons and manually move, aim, and fire the cannons.
Why are humans doing this work? Do you mean to tell me that no one in the Star Wars universe, where robots do the jobs and faster than light travel is possible, no one has thought to just let the droids to the blasting. Hook the quad cannons up to a super computer than can process the movements of the TIE Fighters and respond way quicker than a tiny human brain can.
OK, you might say. Luke switched off his targeting computer and blew up the Death Star. Red Leader used his targeting computer and missed? Isn’t that proof that the human brain is superior? Sure…if you’re a Force user.
I’ve had a half-baked theory in my head that in the Star Wars universe, they purposefully limit the power of droids so they are less of a threat to the living. Sure, there’s your IG-88’s and your HK-87’s, but most droids you see in Star Wars are more like to annoy you than blast you. If all droids were made super smart and super capable, they may just decide they don’t need the sentiants after and you get some sort of Matrix inside of Star Wars type of situation. So the humans dumb down the droids, so to speak. The'’re less dangerous that way.
Unless we’re talking about Chopper. He’s an unrepentant war criminal.
Great Moments in Star Wars Merchandising
I was doomscrolling Facebook one morning and came across this targeted ad.
Did I stare at my phone in shock and disgust? Yes.
Did I also briefly, very briefly, think about placing an order? Also yes.
From the Depths of Wookieepedia
The Slith. No no, not the Sith. The Slith. The column is for the obscure and weird in the Star Wars universe. I don’t think the Sith qualify.
So, have you ever thought the one thing missing from your favorite Star Wars movie was snakes? If that’s the case, you’ll love the Slith.
Yup, sentient space snakes from the moon Yavin 13. The Slith were first introduced, like many of the weird stuff we find on Wookieepedia, in a guide for the Star Wars role playing game from West End Games. The Slith lived in tribes, were hunters, and could communicate by rubbing their scales on the ground, creating different sounds that had different means. They had more appearances in the Star Wars universe than you would think, even showing up the New Jedi Order series. Until the Yuuzhan Vong wipe them out.
Also, there was something I had never seen in Wookieepedia before. A warning that the following information comes from a source that may exist outside the Lucasfilm Licensing process. Folks, if you’re looking up information about a species of sentient space snakes, please take care and only get your information from approved Lucasfilm sources. There’s a lot of fake news out there about the Slith, and nobody wants to fall victim to a hoax.
News From the HoloNet
Grand Admiral Thrawn's Creator Would Have Told A Very Different Ahsoka Story
I would have liked to hear Thrawn expound on Noti folk art or the intricacies of Space Stonehenge. But that’s just me.
Star Wars Canon Finally Fixed The Ending Of Rise of Skywalker
Still needing to be fixed: the rest of that movie.
Why Was "Ahsoka" Season 1 So Emotionally Stunted?
There’s more emotion when my cat greets me after being gone for a few days than there was in Ezra and Sabine’s reunion.
Ahsoka's Mysterious Inquisitor Could Still Be Starkiller From Star Wars Legends
Stop trying to make fetch happen.
That’s it for this week. If you like what I’m doing, please subscribe. I’ll catch you next week, and may the Force be with you.
You are totally right: Huyang's intro in that A-Team style video was hilarious. And accurate!
Of the upcoming stuff, I'm most excited for Andor Season 2 and Acolyte. The latter promises to finally involve people not involved with Skywalkers, which is a step in the right direction. Tho I guess Yoda is still around. Why not move it back a few millenia? As Marty McFly once said, "We've got nothing but time."
I, too, would kill for a live action version of KOTOR. Take my money, Disney! I beg you.